False Path to Peace and Prosperity

I didn't get the job.

That isn't unusual in this economy; most people aren't getting the job. Why am I complaining?

Because I was an excellent candidate. My skills matched exactly what they were looking for, my aptitude was appropriate, and the interview went well, lasting half an hour. The only boggle was that I wasn't super-experienced with a particular software program that was marginally related to the job. I was honest and told them that I wasn't as slick as I could be, but eager to learn.

Afterwards I even sent the recommended thank-you note. I didn't get the job.

I can't help but think that this desperately-needed job would have been mine if only I had lied a little, but I thought it was better to be honest. Was I foolish? Is that what it takes nowadays to get ahead? Heck, forget that- I was merely trying to not go under.

I recently broke up with a girl after eight years; one of the reasons was that I won't say that I loved her, because I didn't think I did, although it would have made her much happier if I had fibbed and fudged a bit.

I understand the little white lie (what a beautiful baby!) that doesn't do any harm. But more and more it seems that it is necessary to lie to just to keep even.

And that isn't the kind of society I want to live in.

Safely Locked Away

How many times have you heard it warbled in songs, spoken earnestly in movies, expounded in books, or whispered over pillows: That solemn pledge that you can tell her anything, because she wants to know the real you, and that honesty is paramount?

Don't believe it.

It's a trap.

If women want to know why men don't share their innermost thoughts, it is because they often get in trouble for them. Are you really surprised that he was looking at that girl? Then why get upset if he admits she is attractive? Don't, don't, don't ask a question you don't want the answer to.

And heaven forbid if you actually have a criticism of her. All promises of amnesty get thrown out of the window, quickly followed by your earthly possessions.

No, it doesn't happen with all women. And it doesn't happen all the time. But it has happened to me often enough that it is much easier, much safer to claim that you aren't thinking, that you don't have any thoughts or opinions.

Tears of a Woman

What is it about a crying woman that makes it such a powerful weapon? Every man I've talked to about this has an almost fear of making the woman cry, because it is a game-ending play on her part, the equivalence of a neutron bomb. The structures are left standing, but the humanity is eliminated. Once she starts, you aren't allowed to continue arguing; doing so works against you.

Why? What is this power? Many times over the course of my life I've been resolute about something, practiced the argument in my head until it seems impregnable, and foolishly plunged in. And she cries... and I immediately find myself backing off, second-guessing myself, weaseling out and giving in. Even when it is against my own best interest.

Why do they have this power? Is it some evolutionary urge to protect the weaker sex? Is it merely a trick to make the woman seem less threatening, like playing possum? Is it an effort to disorient the man by getting him in the unfamiliar territory of emotions?

I only know that I hate hate hate when it happens, because it leaves me feeling helpless.

Which I am.

Because as soon as it starts, I know she's going to get her way. it's only a matter of time.

The Right side of a natural disaster

Haiti was hit by a 7.0 earthquake that flattened up to 80% of the buildings in some areas, collapsed the Presidential Palace, made the seaport unusable, and paralyzed the country. The death toll is 100,000 people, and the estimates are that the final tally could be as high as half a million dead. The are in the slow, tedious, and grueling task of locating people still trapped in the rubble and extricating them, when there is no fuel for machinery, no communication, and no medical services once people are rescued.

The good news is that the internet has allowed donations to happen quicker. Organizations no longer have to wait for pledges and checks; donations are instantaneous. SHARE, the Secular Humanist Aid and Relief Efforts, raised $47,000 in less than 24 hours. Despite our own troubled economy, the US has pledged hundreds of millions in aid, and have begun shipping in food, water, and shelter, with the military to keep order and ensure distribution.

The bad news is that some are seeing this strictly as a way to gain leverage. Pat Robertson claimed that Haitians had made a pact with the devil to overthrow the French, and the earthquake happened 200 years later when god realized it. How does Pat know this? Was he there?

Rush Limbaugh fretted that "this (the earthquake) will play right into Obama's hands" by allowing him to show generosity and compassion to people in need. It seems that not even earthquakes are immune from party politics. Rather than reach out and urge their listeners to help their fellow man, both used the incident to divide and attack. Is it any wonder that both religion and Republicans are in decline?

The link is that both seemed to think there was a purpose to the earthquake, that god would use it to punish innocent people (violating the covenant that the sins of the father wouldn't be visited upon the son, by the way). If god wanted to help Obama, wasn't getting him elected enough? Did he really have to destroy an island that isn't even under our jurisdiction? Couldn't he have just drowned another city, like New Orleans?

Wouldn't it have been better all around if god had simply changed the minds of these two petty troglodytes?

Have you no sense of decency, sirs?

Lost Opportunity

I was making a quick run to the grocery store the other day, New Year's Eve. Things were busy, the parking lot packed. There were still piles of snow pushed up into barriers at the end of the aisles. Things were slow, but people were generally patient and understanding as others negotiated the conditions.

As I parked and approached the building, a young woman came out and got into an SUV that was parked along one of the snow piles, partially blocking the traffic flow. Someone was in the vehicle, waiting for her.

This healthy, young (and apparently feeling entitled) woman put her cart on the other side of the aisle she was in, then hopped into the SUV with her two bags.

The shopping cart was left with one wheel on the snow bank, mostly sticking out and blocking traffic. It was incredibly rude and inconsiderate. If, however, she had gone tangentially, to the side instead of forward, she could have returned the cart to the store sidewalk. It was the same distance, maybe closer.

Although I made a loud comment (that she may not have heard) I didn't do anything else. What I immediately realized I should have done was rush over (I was one aisle away), and moved the cart to in front of the SUV, blocking their way. But I didn't. I hesitated, the moment was lost, and the troglodyte drove away satisfied. The only lasting effect is my shame and anger that I didn't act more quickly and forefully.

Not a Healthy Bill

The Congress is on its way to passing what everybody keeps calling health care reform. Yet in order to appease Republicans (who weren't going to vote for it no matter what), all of the truly bold items have been stripped out of it. The public option is gone. Coverage for abortions is gone. Preventative medicine is gone. All of which was done to satiate people that wouldn't approve any way.

What is left is the government mandating that we purchase a private product.

As much as I approve of the goal- doing something about the potentially catastrophic medical bills- I hate the means. If the government wanted everybody to have insurance, it should have just provided it. This is a bad, bad compromise.

Timing is everything

The recent climate change talks in Copenhagen were mired down and uninspired. No real change happened, just a promise to do something vague in the future. The media outlets barely noticed.

Could it be because they are talking about global warming in Scandinavia in winter? Whose bright idea was that?

Want to get some results? Schedule the next meeting in Egypt in the heat, or one of these island nations that is only a couple of feet above sea level. I bet they become amazingly motivated when they have to worry if each wave is getting bigger...